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18 Couples on the Song that Defines Their Relationship

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If my years-long obsession with so-bad-they’re-actually-good romantic comedies taught me anything, it’s that the grand recognition of love moment usually comes in the form of the classic “our song” scene. You’ve seen it before: The couple will have an intense argument, or there will be a big revelation that someone lied in an effort to protect the other’s feelings, leading to some sort of split. Time will pass and somehow, the couple will “randomly” spot each other in a crowded area while a sappy love song plays faintly in the background. A deep sigh of relief will follow, then someone will say, “Honey, they’re playing our song,” before the dramatic romantic embrace.

For many IRL couples, their special song is tied to a memory that brings them back to an important moment in their relationship—the first date, the first road trip, first dance, the first argument, etc.—and is the glue that holds the couple together. So in honor of Valentine’s Day, I asked 18 couples to share the special song that defines their relationship, from Axwell’s bright dance banger “More Than You Know” to Major’s ridiculously romantic ballad “This Is Why I Love You.”

Jessica and Michael

Our Story: “Michael and I went to High School together and had mutual friends, but we started talking sophomore year during Ms. Lai’s art class. I used to catch him always sneaking glances at me, and when I would look his direction he would quickly look away. Eventually, he asked for my AIM name, and we ended up talking every single day. I’ll admit that I always thought he was cute but I never imagined he’d like a girl like me. At the end of summer before the new school year started, we decided to meet up to hang out and he finally expressed his true feelings towards me and we had our first kiss on September 5th, 2010. We’ve been inseparable ever since. I guess you can say we are true high school sweethearts.”—Jessica

Our Song: “Say You Won’t Let Go” by James Arthur. “Every time I hear this song, our memories play on loop in my head. There’s a particular line James Arthur sings that says, “I held your hair back when you were throwing up”—it always reminds me of that one time I got so drunk he had to carry me home, and stayed up all night with a bucket next to me.”

Favorite Line: “’I wanna stay with you until we’re gray and old,’ because it is exactly what we both hope for.”

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Angel and Mikáel

Our Story: “September 2006. Both Mikáel and I entered our freshman year at Clark Atlanta University as Presidential scholars, and members of the Honors’ Program. We had a class together, but only knew each other from afar. I deemed him a cocky boy from California, and he deemed me someone worthy of pursuit — naturally (lol). Each fall, HP—as we called it—held an annual cabin retreat where incoming students could connect with upperclassmen in the program, and bond over a weekend of activities and workshops. One of those was an unsupervised kickback, where I ended up drinking alcohol for the first time, getting tipsy, and finding relief in Mikáel who took me outside for air, and to sway under the stars (aw). The next day, it was time to return to campus, and I figured I’d sit by Mikáel on our charter bus ride back. I boarded the bus to find him sitting next to another girl. Fool me once. Once back at school, there was a Gospel Explosion (it was a Sunday, and we went to a historically black university). I went with a few of my dormmates, and that cocky boy was there too, with yet another girl. Boy, bye. Let’s talk about audacity: he left the second girl to come sit with me and my friends. Tried it. My guard was up, but it didn’t take him long to bring it down. After, we sat on our campus’s infamous promenade, and talked for hours—HOURS. And he made me laugh. Deep-belly laugh. We’ve been inseparable ever since.”—Angel

Our Song: “This What I Call Her” by Lil’ Wayne. “Mikáel, a huge Wayne fan, played it for me and said it reminded him of me. And that was that. The first line of the song, and a few bars down, has an ‘Angel’ drop, of course.”

Favorite Line:Miss, butter pecan, caramel, southern belle / She hotter than a summer day in hell…She an angel her name should be An-gel.”

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Baylen and Anthony

Our Story: “We met each other the first week we both moved to New York in August of 2015—we went to the same college and were introduced by our mutual friend who insisted we meet. Being the millennials that we are, we first exchanged Snapchats before numbers (LOL). Later that night, we got together to hit the town with a group of our newly-made friends and ended up staying out all night together having so much fun around the city. Now, 5 years later, we live together and both work in the fashion industry. We don’t know what New York is like without each other since we’ve been together from the start.”—Baylen

Our Song: “New York, New York” by Frank Sinatra. “On our first major trip as a couple to Italy, we visited this little authentic restaurant on the Amalfi Coast where we were somehow forced into performing quite possibly the worst karaoke rendition of “New York, New York” (by demand of the restaurant’s owner since that was the only English song he knew and help from on-the-house limoncello). Whenever we hear the song we are reminded of how we did, in fact, make it in New York by finding each other and always crack up laughing at the memory of that dinner in Italy.”

Favorite Line: “If I can make it there, I’ll make it anywhere/It’s up to you, New York, New York.”

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Brianna and Tashan

Our Story: “I was the new girl at work so I really didn’t speak to anyone. I would always see Tashan and I thought he was cute. but we worked on different floors. When I finally mustered up the courage to say ‘Hi,’ I asked him what his name was. After that day, anytime we would see each other we spoke. One day, he asked me to go out to dinner and I was hesitant about saying yes because I knew I would be shy. Reluctantly, I agreed to go and we went to this restaurant called Mexican Radio in Soho. We spent the whole night at the restaurant just talking and eating and the conversation flowed naturally. During our meal, he told me that that there was something about me he found interesting, which is why he wanted to get to know me. After dinner, we exchanged numbers and spoke on phone and saw each other everyday. This month (February), we make 6 years together.”—Brianna

Our Song: “Ascension” by Maxwell.

Favorite Line: “It happened the moment, when you were revealed/Cause you were a dream that you should not have been, a fantasy real”

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Cameron and Tyran

Our Story: “We met at the University of West Georgia through an organization I started on our campus for Caribbean students. We shared the same friend group and got really close. One summer, I worked in New York and he flew up to spend some time with me. All of our friends were shook because we tried to keep it low at first. We had our first date at Dos Caminos on Broadway so now our favorite thing to do is try different Mexican spots. At first, I was scared to talk to him because of the Jamaican man stereotype. (Let’s just say when it comes to dating, they have a bad rep). But boom, look at us now.”—Cameron

Our Song: “No Odda” by Kranium. “This song is basically about friends realizing that they’re made for each other, which basically explains us. We were best friends before we started dating officially and when this song dropped, we knew it was written for us.”

Favorite Line: “‘Look how far we ah come from, you mi love a done pon’ is my favorite line because I never saw this coming but I don’t see it ending.”

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Alyssa and Patrick

Our Story: “This is a NY love story, if you will—pre-dating apps (or maybe I just avoided them). My best friend Lauren was actually the one being set up with Patrick, and she brought me as her wing-man. We met up with her friend (who had set them up) and Patrick at Rosemary’s in the West Village before we all went to Greenwich Treehouse. I sat back, like the good wing woman I was, and just people-watched. (My “mysterious vibe,” as he called it, intrigued him.) We all hung out all night long but in the end, Lauren knew he wasn’t into her and he eventually made it very clear he was into me. A one night stand turned into a really solid friendship. He understood me, appreciated my quirks and most importantly, we always had fun; he was adventurous, loved trying new places and had the same dark aura as I did. It took months to admit we were dating, and 5 years later he proposed to me. On all the adventures and the growth we’ve both experienced the past six and a half years, we still have a hell of a time no matter where we’re going or what we’re doing. Our song proves that.”—Alyssa

Our Song: “Absinthe Party at The Fly Honey Warehouse” by Minus the Bear. “It was our wedding song and is very untraditional and off-beat. The lyrics mean everything because it describes us perfectly. Patrick introduced it to me when we first met because of the lyric, ‘This light looks good on you, morning came early’ as we had a ton of late nights out when we first met because we were always on opposite schedules.”

Favorite Line:Let’s cross the seas, and get some culture, red wine, with every meal, and absinthe after dinner.’ We decided to make this our wedding song because we wanted to see the world together, and travel has always been extremely important to us. (We crossed the country two years into our relationship on a three week road trip.)”

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Dominique and Hans

Our Story: “Our story is what you’d call an anomaly that ‘beat the odds.’ We were two happily single, very alpha personalities who met in a sea of Hinge likes but surprisingly had the most perfect first date on Friday the 13th (also during a full harvest moon, might I add). To feel an instant connection with someone and allow yourself to be captivated and swept away by wherever the moment takes you, no matter how unorthodox, is something you can’t really explain. It’s something you feel and know is right. By no means are we perfect, but we have found a balance in learning and growing with someone through life, love and conflict.”—Dominique

Our Song: “Stay” by Neyo ft. Peedi Peedi. “This song is one of the biggest factors that has held us together and reminded us of why we enjoy each other, especially when we hit our low points. It’s like having your favorite song in the background when you’re sad, it’ll make you feel a bit better and remind you of the good times you’ve had and get you out of the funk you’re in.”

Favorite Line: “Cause I like to turn you on. You’re like my favorite song, without you would be wrong. (Would be wrong.) Forever and always. Did you know what you do for me? Love you, you’re my melody. Wearing my heart on my sleeve. You’re all I need.”

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Jovy and Leon

Our Story: “We actually met through a mutual friend during happy hour at a bar named Calico Jack in the city. When I met him, I thought he was a bus boy at Applebees because he wore full black from head to toe. As it turned out, he was actually a manager at a retail store. He was really nice and the first thing he noticed about me was the bandaid I had on my face (I actually went to remove a mole from my face before the happy hour so he struck up a conversation by asking to see pics of my face pre-mole removal). At the end of the night, he offered to take our mutual friend and I home but I declined and insisted on taking the train instead. My friend convinced me to take the ride, and during it Leon thought I was a bit rude because I asked him to turn down his extremely loud reggae music. Despite his initial reservations, he asked my friend for my number. He called a few days later and I told him I was hungry so we went for dinner and it turned out great.”—Jovy

Our Song: “This Why I Love You” by Major.” I loved the song and then Leon eventually fell in love with song so much he used it to me.”

Favorite Line: “Never have I felt that I could be all that you see/ It’s like our hearts have intertwined into the perfect harmony.”

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Dora and Vince

Our Story: “I decided to create a Bumble one Saturday evening and he was one of my first matches. I still remember the first message he sent me: ‘Dreams do come true!’ We talked for a few days until deciding to actually go on a date. Even though we come from different cultures (he’s Taiwanese and I’m half-Cuban and half Antiguan), we had a lot in common and instantly clicked. We lost track of time talking and watching movies, so much so that the date didn’t end until 4 am (team no sleep). Our second date was the following day and we made pizza. We still love eating food and losing ourselves in conversation a little more than a year later.”—Dora

Our Song: “More Than You Know” by Axwell & Ingrosso. “We both love EDM and the song really conveys the way we feel about each other.”

Favorite Line: “You should know that baby you’re the best/Yeah, more than you know”

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Jerry and Caterina

Our Story: “Bae and I actually met for the first time after a church service in 2007 when I was introduced to her by a mutual friend. I remember our first ever conversation being full of laughter and nerves—well, nerves at least on my end. During our conversation, I vividly remember her calling me the biggest flirt she’d ever met. Life got busy for both us with her going off to school and me beginning my career in the corporate world after graduating high school. But we still kept in contact with each other over the years. After some years off in school, bae came back to the city and decided to continue her education here. At the time, my father also recently passed away and she became a beacon of light for me in a time of darkness. We started going together to church conventions and these conventions helped us to know each other better and build on our friendship. I took her for her driving lesson, which she later passed. We did our laundry together and everything else together—I knew it was time to make our relationship official. I’ve always believed that every lasting relationship should also have a loving friendship.”—Jerry

Our Song: “Why I Love You” by Major

Favorite Line: “It’s like our hearts have intertwined, and to the perfect harmony”

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Maati and Onyx

Our Song: “This past summer, we met at a mutual friend’s play and instantly clicked. He was full of jokes and something about him felt so familiar that I wanted to know more about him. One thing lead to another and we began hanging out all the time. We went to festivals, dinner dates, museums—you name it. To this day we are still going strong and he’s my best friend.”—Onyx

Our Song: “All of Me” by John Legend. “One day ‘All of Me’ came on in a pizza shop and we just started singing it out loud to each other. We didn’t care who was watching or listening because it felt like so special.”

Favorite Line: “You’re my end and my beginning.” “He is my soulmate and from the very first time I met him I felt something special. He’s my happy ending.”

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Linda and Jonathan

Our Story: “We met on New Year’s Eve 2017 through a mutual friend and got really high and I didn’t think I would ever see him again. Thanks to social media, he slid into my DM with a Jackie Robinson reference from Jackie’s 1955 World Series game. After that, we started talking casually. One day, I pretended that I was going to NYC to go see an ice sculpture festival in Central Park and asked if he was free to meet me, low-key making it our first date. The rest was history!”

Our Song: “Love” by Kendrick Lamar. “Kendrick Lamar was our first concert together and every time we hear that song we think of each other.”

Favorite Line: “Keep it a hundred, I’d rather you trust me than to (love me)/Keep it a whole one hund’, if I don’t got you I got nothing”

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Nia and Ness

Our Story: “We met online. I was scrolling through the website Plenty of Fish and saw Ness’s profile and thought she was cute. After realizing that we were both attending the same university, I decided to slide in the DM and shoot my shot. Ness responded right away because she thought I was incredibly beautiful. After a few messages, Ness gave me her number and then we started texting right away. We were attending Temple University and I was a dance major and was having a performance that weekend. I invited Ness (well, Ness invited herself), and not only did Ness come but she showed up an hour early with flowers. She was so early that the choreographer had to kick her out. I saw Ness walk into the theater and got so nervous that I turned away. To this day, I am so grateful that Ness didn’t just leave and go home. Right when I walked on stage, and the lights came up, the first person I saw was Ness. I knew from that moment we were meant to be. After the show, Ness gave me a ride back to my dorm…….and never left ;). We basically moved in together that night. Six years, 10 months, and two cats later, we are still inseparable. For the past three years we have been working together as performance artists. As we said earlier, I’m a dancer and Ness is a poet. We work together performing work about our lives as a Black, out Lesbian couple.”—Nia

Our Song: “Her” by Raury. “This song is so special to us because in 2016, Nia had her first solo gig in NYC called You and it was about her love for Ness; the piece brought tears to Ness’s eyes and she was so touched by Nia’s piece, she downloaded the song and began playing it every day on her ride to work.”—Ness

Favorite Line: “Our heart’s the same, so we share/Everything from joy to pain”

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Vanessa and Pedro

Our Story: “I was on Facebook one night and saw a photo of a group of guys. I saw Pedro all the way on the right and was like ‘Damn, he is handsome,’ and felt compelled to message him, which I for the record have never, ever done before. I slid in his DM and he messaged me back about a day later. We started talking on the phone like high school kids, day after day, until 4 am, talking about everything and anything, very comfortably. Before we had even met in person, there was an obvious explosive connection that neither one of us had ever felt before. It was very intense for the both of us and we knew very early that we had found our person.”—Vanessa

Our Song: “Best Part” by Daniel Caesar ft. H.E.R. “We relate to this song so much because we always say that life, even the mundane, daily tasks, are so much better when we have each other. Nothing we do, big or small, means as much if we can’t share it with one another.”

Favorite Line: “I just wanna see how beautiful you are/You know that I see itI know you’re a star/Where you go I follow/No matter how farIf life is a movie/Then you’re the best part”

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Raven and Christopher

Our Story: “We met at the beginning of summer 2017—May 13th, to be exact. Christopher always talks about how he used to see me around all the time because he knows most of my friends and I never really spoke, and he thought I was aloof or didn’t like him for some odd reason. Nevertheless, we were at a graduation party in DC when he says that I ‘caught his eye’ a few times that night, prompting him to come over. He eventually walked up to my friend and asked her, ‘Who’s your friend?’ She pushed me to him and said ‘Talk to him, girl.’ He told me I looked beautiful and that he had been admiring me from afar, and asked if he could have my number so that we could get to know each other and he could take me out sometime. I obliged.”—Raven



Our Song:
“Best Part” by Daniel Caesar ft. H.E.R. “Whenever we hear this song, we get quiet and look at each other and smile. If the song came on while we were driving, our hands would be locked together. “



Favorite Line
: “If life is a movie, then you’re the best part” “To know that our best part of this movie called life is each other is endearing and awe-inspiring.”

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Trisha and Raymone

Our Story: “Raymone and I met when we were stationed in D.C. with the Marines in 2015. We clicked right away and hung out every day with our group. We all became really close, but one day we hung out just the two of us and we realized we liked each other more than friends. We are now newly married and have a 2-year-old son named Royce.”—Trisha

Our Song: “On Your Body” by Chinx. “This was the first song we played every time we got in the car and the song he would play to break the silence after a little argument. Every time I hear it it brings me back to when we first started dating.”

Favorite Line: You know you my baby, ain’t no second guessin'”

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Tisha and Taurien

Our Story: “Our love story begins with two best friends walking arm in arm away from their university’s campus towards an apartment in West Philadelphia. I was accompanying my friend on a Netflix and Chill session so she would have someone to walk home with (because she for sure wasn’t sleeping there) late at night. As I sat in the living room aimlessly scrolling through Twitter to distract myself, Taurien walked into the apartment in a suit coming home from a long day at his internship. We locked eyes and smiled—he knew the vibes. We talked and he teased me about never watching Friday before. Taurien popped in the movie and seven years later we’re still together in West Philly.”—Tisha

Our Song: “As” by Stevie Wonder. “Taurien sung it to me when we saw Stevie Wonder perform at a concert in Philly.”

Favorite Line: As today I know I’m living but tomorrow/Could make me the past but that I mustn’t fear/For I’ll know deep in my mind, the love of me I’ve left behind/’Cause I’ll be loving you always”

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Shallanda and TJ

Our Story: “My friends dragged me out to have dinner one night. Skeptical and unsure if I wanted to go, I agreed to go because it had been about four months since I left my last relationship so things were still kind of up and down for me. We went to dinner at Dos Caminos and then I joined them at the bar across the street. While everyone was drunk and wasted having the time of their lives, I remember thinking to myself ‘Why the hell am I here?’ A guy and his friend came up to my friends and said they were trying to find another spot to go to. Then, I heard his Jamaican accent. (I had always told myself that I would never date a Jamaican.) Eventually we joined the guys and he introduced himself as Tj. We talked for awhile, but in my mind I didn’t see this going anywhere. Still, we exchanged numbers and went our separate ways that night. To my surprise, I got a text from him and we spent the entire day talking and getting to know each other. Both of us had been in relationships that unfortunately didn’t end well and I was very unsure if I would ever meet someone that had a genuine heart and was looking for something that was more than just physical. Needless to say, five years and one beautiful daughter later, Tj has definitely proved to be more than what I could ever imagine or ask for. Thank God I never gave him the wrong number!”—Shallanda

Our Song: “So Into You” by Fabolous ft Tamia

Favorite Line: “I really like what you’ve done to me I can’t really explain it, I’m so into you” “From the day he entered my life there has been a smile on my face. I never believed in ‘true love’ or ‘fairytales’ but the last five years has truly been the most magical. “

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